do you ever just sit around and think about how gross it is that a bunch of men took a show made for young girls, that taught them great lessons, that femininity isnt weak, the importance of girl-girl friendships, and made it all about them, their sexual fantasies, and their political theories?
I’ve never seen a post so accurately sum up all my feelings.
I’m not a misandrist but, men are so damn emotional. When they get mad at you, they shut down and don’t talk to you or they throw hissy fits. And then if you try to talk to them like adults, they get all irrational and start yelling gendered slurs and/or block you on fb.
i identify with fight club a lot because i also like to express my nonconformity through traditional masculine violence and misogyny. it really goes against what society wants me to do. no wait
[TW: Sexual Assault] When young women are sexually assaulted, we question their pasts and critique their clothing choices, yet rarely ask their attackers to simply be accountable for having no self-control, and no respect for the humanity of the girls they’ve violated.
When middle school girls post half–naked photos of themselves on Instagram, we vilify and ostracize them as cheap and easy, while ignoring the dozens of young men who mindlessly vote their approval each time, who feed the insecurity, and who perpetuate each degrading act with the click of a mouse.
When high school girls get jobs at chain restaurants, which require them to expose their body parts to strangers over trays of nachos, we bemoan their lack of humility and class, yet never question the thousands of men who fill these eateries every day; many with daughters the same age as the ones they ogle.
When women embarrassingly writhe on poles for a few sweaty dollar bills, in dimly lit bars ironically called “Gentlemen’s Clubs”, we heap insults and judgement on them, yet let the many married men who pay both the dancers and the mortgage each month, come and go without blemish or critique.
Sooner or later, we need to stop letting boys be boys, and we need to challenge them to be men.
Sooner or later, we need to pull them out of their perpetual adolescence and into adulthood, and ask them to evenly carry the weight of sexual standards.
Sooner or later, we need to show our young men that the they can actually raise the moral temperature in sexual situations, not reflect them."
3 dudes attempt a smoky eyes makeup tutorial while I fight for gasps of air
But on a serious note, this is why I get annoyed when people say that makeup isn’t an art or a skill, or why it annoys me when dudes don’t understand why it takes girls so long to get ready, but also expect us to look perfect at the same time. This shit is HARD. Bask in our glory!
with Ed. M, Ph.D Jackson Katz
Same for mass shootings which are almost entirely done by white males.
If it was done by, literally, ANYONE ELSE of any other race or gender, I can’t even IMAGINE the shit that would be said by people.
I read somewhere, someone had this theory that the reason shootings are mainly committed by white males is because when women or poc feel alienated, depressed, etc, we are trained to keep it to ourselves, whereas white men are raised with a sense of entitlement that allows them to make their own problems everyone’s problem.
I wonder if it is true for shooting or for road rage or both or neither.
This is a really good documentary.
BEST DOCUMENTARY I’VE EVER SEEN, actually.
have you noticed that when someone goes ‘i was bitten by a dog once and now I’m kinda wary around them’ most people are like ‘aw, I understand’ but if a woman says she’s been raped/abused by men in the past and is now scared of them she gets told she’s paranoid and needs to get over it?
I noticed that.
have you noticed that when a dog bites a person, it gets put down
At a popular lingerie store, I asked for assistance in the general vicinity of another young lady and the gentleman accompanying her. I pointed out the style I’d like and told the salesperson my size- a 32DD. The young man, at this point, turned and walk towards me and stated, “No, you’re not a DD. Those are too small to be that size. You’re a C or something.” Ah… A “C or something”. The salesperson and I were momentarily flummoxed, but I reiterated my size to her. He seemed to feel offended ay my choice to ignore his suggestion and he continued, “Listen, baby, you’re not a DD. And you don’t want that, it doesn’t have any padding. You want something to push your boobs up and make them look bigger.” At that point, he reaches toward my chest and- hands inches from my breasts- motions to indicate just what he means by “push your boobs up”.
At this invasion of my personal space, my privacy, and so much more, I told him to get his hands away from me and kindly shove off. He called me a psycho bitch before his girlfriend dragged him away, mortified… over my behavior.
The bra fits fine. Who’da thunk? Measurements, a professional, and my level of intimacy with my own breasts were more accurate than his mansplaining!
It’s fine for men to watch shojo anime and read shojo manga like Sailor Moon and Cardcaptor Sakura.
It’s fine for men to make pornographic doujinshi of these, buy figurines, and jack off to the characters.
It’s fine for men to completely invade a Pretty Cure forum created for young girls and scare said girls away. It’s fine for these men to twist the entire fandom around themselves, its fine for them to show up to Pretty Cure events in throngs and its fine for them to frantically grab all the free handouts before any of the girls can.
It’s also fine for men to take these magical girl anime made for girls that celebrate being a girl and make them all about their pornography and which girl they most want to put their dick in. It’s fine, because theres even a cute name for them, ‘Ooki Tomodachi’ (Big Friend).
It’s fine for them to do the same with My Little Pony, of course. It’s fine that they can make the voice actors of the show uncomfortable with personal questions, its fine that they can yell out rape jokes to them at conventions, its fine that they have basically made it impossible for any of the 8 year old girls the show was made for to ever google it in public. It’s fine for them to gather in the toy stores around the pony toys and intimidate young girls. It’s fine that the whole show, created to celebrate femininity and how ‘theres no wrong way to be a girl’ is now associated with their fetishes. And its so fine that these male fans get given a cute name (‘brony’), get documentaries made about them, have newspaper article after blog post after feature talking about how they are ‘challenging gender norms’ and ‘transforming pop culture’.
But if a girl ‘trespasses’ into a male space, what happens? (Even when it isnt ‘trespassing’, in the case of Free!, in which a space was actually made for us ) We can expect such timeless classics as: degradation, ‘you’re not even a REAL fan!’ ‘I bet you dont even know ______’, all kinds of threats, and, of course, the posts you see on this blog."
In news we all already know, scientists at the University of Sheffield have found that high quality science work by women is being given low exposure in favour of work by male scientists. Men were more likely than women be invited to present and show off their work even when you factor in the reduced number of female scientists by comparison to men.
filed under: colour me shocked.
Here’s the thing - when you argue that it’s impossible to teach men not to rape, you are saying that rape is natural for men. That this is just something men do. Well I’m sorry, but I think more highly of men than that. (And if you are a man who is making this argument, you’ll forgive me if I don’t ever want to be in a room alone with you.)
And when you insist that the only way to prevent rape is for women change their behavior - whether it’s recommending that they carry a weapon or not wear certain kinds of clothing - you are not only giving out false information, you are arguing that misogyny is a given. That the world will continue to be a dangerous and unfair place for women and we should just get used to the fact. It’s a pessimistic and frankly, lazy, view on life. Because when you argue that this is “just the way things are,” what you are really saying is - I don’t care enough to do anything about it."
-Rape Is Not Inevitable: On Zerlina Maxwell, Men and Hope, my latest at The Nation (via jessicavalenti)
This is PERFECT.
The men’s movement seems to stay stuck on two points. The first is that men don’t really feel very good about themselves. How could you? The second is that men come to me or to other feminists and say: “What you’re saying about men isn’t true. It isn’t true of me. I don’t feel that way. I’m opposed to all of this.”
And I say: don’t tell me. Tell the pornographers. Tell the pimps. Tell the warmakers. Tell the rape apologists and the rape celebrationists and the pro-rape ideologues. Tell the novelists who think that rape is wonderful. Tell Larry Flynt. Tell Hugh Hefner. There’s no point in telling me. I’m only a woman. There’s nothing I can do about it. These men presume to speak for you. They are in the public arena saying that they represent you. If they don’t, then you had better let them know."
Andrea Dworkin- I Want a 24 Hour Truce in Which There is No Rape, ( http://www.nostatusquo.com/ACLU/dworkin/WarZoneChaptIIIE.html )
R.I.P. to all the men and boys who have been abused, assaulted, and killed but are only remembered when someone needs a tragic example to reason away the suffering of women.
I’m so sorry that misogynists only see you as tools to enforce oppression.
You deserve so much better than that.