Who the FUCK do I strangle as punishment for turning “atheist” into a shorthand for “bigoted sexist asshole man” on tumblr and some other parts of the internet? And by that I mean why the holy living mongoose-juggling shitfuck do atheist/skeptic communities have as much sexism and misogyny in their communities as they do. Seriously, this is fucking bullshit and you’re going to sit down and listen to me explain my meaning.
What makes me sad is the fact that this has 52,000 notes :( About fifty-two thousand people relate to a quote saying that they feel tired all the time. That just isn’t right. Sleep is so important, and yet the quality of it for the majority of people is very sub-par. I think it should be of importance to educate people about getting good sleep, because it is one of THE most important things in life, along with food, water and shelter, but it is just not prioritized in society. I am a full supporter of the initiatives some high schools have taken of starting school later, because the reality is that teenagers do not release melatonin until late at night, and expecting them to be wide awake and functioning at 7am is just unrealistic.
I can honestly say that I cannot remember the last time I have had a good night’s sleep. I can’t remember a time when I went to bed, and the next thing I know is I’m waking up in the morning, because I wake up constantly in the night, have diabetic problems which force me to wake up and have glucose or go to the bathroom, and I have terrible dreams, and just.. argh. I go to bed at fucking 8:30pm. My sleep is terrible. I just want to cry when I think about it. I am always tired.
Please don’t be sorry: I am extremely pleased that you sent me this ask. 1) because it makes me feel special coz there are thousands of tumblrers who could probably answer this better than me, but you chose me and that is very flattering :) and 2) it is so great that you are asking this! Even the experts on this issue didn’t know about it at first, and I am just so glad that you are taking the time to ask about it before forming your view. Most pro-lifers won’t have looked at the issue objectively before forming their view, because their logic is full of gaps and their arguments can be shredded with a few questions. So, bravo to you for asking questions and forming objective, informed views! :)
It’s hard for me to explain the entirety of both arguments in one post, so first of all I’ll direct you to my pro-choice tag, as I have reblogged many posts about it. There are quite a few different arguments within the pro-choice/pro-life debate: when does a fetus gain personhood rights, is a fetus a human, what does an abortion consist of, why pro-lifers are hypocrites, etc etc. It’s something that I could talk about for hours! I’m just trying to think of a succinct way to give you enough information.
Ok, I’m compiling a list of resources which should cover most aspects, but please do not hesitate to send me another ask if you have any more questions.
- Why pro-choice =/= pro-abortion.
- A really good read about “how to stop abortion” that would convert any compassionate, intelligent pro-lifer to pro-choice.
- A personal story that tears apart the “but you can just put it up for adoption!” argument.
- Proof from the 50s and 60s that when abortions are illegal, many women will try to self-abort using horrific means, which leads to immense death rates. Abortions need to be kept legal and safe.
- Abortion happens in nature.
- Abortion in the third trimester, when the fetus is objectively a “child”.
- One reason why it is so important to let the pregnant person make their own choice about what happens to their body.
- Another story that should convert any pro-lifer with a shred of compassion that it is essential that women (and people with uteri) can choose whether they give birth or not, because the consequences of an unplanned, unwanted pregnancy are dire.
Woo ok I need to get stuff ready for bed so I’ll stop here, but I hope you find the links healpful, and as I said, feel free to message me again if you need any more info :)
As a direct answer to your question “Surely anything that kills children can’t be good, right?”, fetuses/embryos/blastocysts are NOT children; they do not have human rights, the right of personhood, their rights simply cannot trump the rights of the pregnant people carrying them. I would explain further, but I need to go!
Thanks for the ask!
Chronically ill readers share unhelpful and hurtful comments made by others.
This is so dumb though…. 99% of those comments were made my people who were just trying to be helpful or…
i still don’t see where the hurtful part is. I wasn’t even being rude with my comments I’m just calling you out on you bullshit…
the comments though, I can see how they would get old after a while, like boring. like how people comment on my height or when people ask my sister and I if we are twins… but hurtful? Nooo
You guys are kinda milking the conditions you have, for atttention.
The funniest part I think is the part where someone said “maybe if uyou stop Talking about it you’ll get better” lmao isnt that kinda a warning sign that you might be MILKING THE SHIT OUT OF IT AND PEOPLE ARE GETTING A LITTLE TIRED OF HEARING YOU TALK ABOUT YOUR ILLNESS?
laughing at the people with “chronic pain” and depression who think that by being positive towards them is offensive
and laughing harder at the woman who wrote an entire article about it for attention
sorry but we don’t live in a perfect world and not everyone has the energy to pretend to give a shit beyond being positive and brushing it off by saying “let’s go out for lunch when you’re better”
Wow, you are even a bigger fucking asshole than I first thought. “Milking our conditions”? And people expressing their frustrations at their disability on their own personal blogs is “getting old and boring”?
I’ll say it again: I SINCERELY hope that you don’t have anyone with chronic illnesses in your life, because they don’t need an insensitive douchebag like you claiming that they are “milking their conditions”.
And how fucking dare you put the words chronic pain in quotation marks, like it’s a made up term. Do you know what chronic pain is? It’s fucking pain that doesn’t fucking go away. And you have the fucking nerve to come on here, and put quotes around it as if to question its legitimacy, and dump shit all over people who are reblogging an article to raise awareness about what they find helpful, and what they don’t. Any decent able-bodied person who reads the article will think, “damn, I know I do some of those things. I didn’t realize they were hurtful, I’ll try and be a bit more sensitive next time”. YOU are clearly not part of that group.
“we don’t live in a perfect world” You’ve made that fucking clear. However, SOME of us are trying to make it a better place and be kinder to marginalized groups, and YOU are not helping by laughing at them.
Holy shit. I didn’t think it was humanly possible to be that much of an asshole. I demand a dollar per word in the douchebag jar.
“I’m just calling you out on you bullshit…” No. When a group of people say “stop doing xyz to us,” you FUCKING STOP DOING IT. It’s like if a bunch of trans* people endorsed an article discussing the fact that they dislike being referred to as “it.” Accusing them of seeking attention or “milking their condition” is neither helpful nor acceptable. It’s the same with people who have a disability or chronic illness.
“like how people comment on my height or when people ask my sister and I if we are twins…” Being tall or having a strong resemblance to a member of your family is not even in the same universe as having a chronic illness, so just stop there and never bring that point up ever again because it makes you look like a dumbass.
“You guys are kinda milking the conditions you have, for atttention.” Are you serious? Do you think people with chronic illnesses wake up each morning and think, “hmmm, I wonder how much sympathy I can get today!”? Believe me, attention is the last thing on the list of priorities. I’d say getting through the day is a bit higher up.
“someone said “maybe if uyou stop Talking about it you’ll get better” lmao isnt that kinda a warning sign that you might be MILKING THE SHIT OUT OF IT” Okay no. Just no. Let me put this in perspective for you. I have a friend who is in a wheelchair. She can’t walk. She will never be able to walk. She isn’t going to regain the ability to walk just because she stops talking about the fact that she can’t walk. And when we’re out and about in a group, and we’re coming to a flight of stairs, is keeping quiet going to get her up those stairs? No, it’s probably just going to mean she’ll be taking the elevator alone. If she says something, on the other hand, other people will probably go with her, cause that’s a polite thing to do and makes her feel more accepted, and nice people do things like that. So is her alerting other people to the ramifications of her obvious physical disability “milking the shit out of it”? No, not at all. So why is it any different when the disability is less visible?
“laughing at the people with “chronic pain” and depression who think that by being positive towards them is offensive” First off - scare quotes, no. Don’t do that.
It’s not positivity that is so offensive, it’s platitudes. A friend being genuinely positive and saying, for instance, “I love you no matter how you feel and this illness does not affect your worth as a person,” is not in the least offensive and is in fact probably something that every person with a disability would love to hear from their friends and family. A friend saying, “snap out of it, it’s all in your mind and you just need a hobby,” is incredibly offensive in a way that induces giant green rage.
I think the best thing to do is try not to say things that belittle the other person’s suffering. Just a good rule of thumb. Also, please remove yourself from this part of the internet because you are an asshole. Thanks.
When I first joined tumblr, I created the account steampunkbanana. Then I created a second blog, (yellow-dress) but the thing is, every time I like a post or ask a question or follow someone, the person sees it as being from ‘steampunkbanana’, and there is no option to change that, or make yellow-dress my primary blog. And this is fucking annoying and confusing for people. And if I want to participate in a giveaway but have to be following the person, I can make as many reblogs as I like on yellow-dress, but the giveaway person will never see that ‘yellow-dress’ has followed them, and thus I might miss out! And I hate having to send asks from steampunkbanana because people are like who the fuck are you and I always have to say “yellow-dress” here!
Thing #2736297810794w753980-HYUGRFVbjdm I dislike about tumblr (along with the shitty search options, the failure to listen to reports of abuse, the pathetic excuse for a ‘blocking’ system, their scaremongering of people who use missing-e, not having the missing-e functions in the first fucking place, the fact that you can’t add commentary to ‘chat’ posts because it automatically comes up in the chat format and you can’t tell who wrote it, etc etc etc).
But tumblr is my life so I can’t complain too much.
Casual anti-Semitism is believing there’s no valid reason to circumcise a child.
Casual anti-Semitism is acting like circumcision is on the same level as female genital cutting.
Casual anti-Semitism is calling circumcision “mutilation.”
Disagreeing with cutting the genitals of a child who has no capacity to choose it for him/herself… is anti-Semitic? Christians do it, too. Is it okay to disagree with a Christian then?
There are more cultures and religions who perform circumcision besides christians and jewish individuals. If it’s not your culture, you don’t get a say in it. The most you can do is not do it to your own children. That’s all.
life-tbd I usually agree with everything you post but I have to state my disagreement here. I don’t believe that people should be immune from criticizing something just because it’s part of someone’s ‘culture’ (but of course this shouldn’t be an excuse for all the racists and cultural appropriators). It’s just… a lot of things can be passed as ‘culture’. And sometimes those things violate human (/animal/environmental etc) rights. I believe it is more important to fight for human rights than it is to be hush-hush about another’s culture. For instance, I have signed quite a few petitions against ritual animal slaughter that still goes on, and one could easily say that it is none of my business because it is a cultural thing, but to me, those animal’s lives are far more important than any ritual or tradition.
And in this case, male circumcision, I have done quite a deal of research about the negative effects of it (I used to believe that female circumcision was barbaric but there was nothing wrong with male circumcision). If you’re interested I’ll happily pull up some of the facts about MC and why I am so opposed to it. Because I care far more about bodily autonomy than what some stone-age book instructs us to do. I don’t believe it is enough to just refrain from doing it to my own kids. There is a lot of misinformation out there about MC, even coming from medical institutions, and I am going to challenge it. It doesn’t matter if the person advocating for circumcision is a white American who just thinks the penis looks better that way (although caring about the aesthetic of their baby’s penis is fucked up to me: let the child make the decision themselves when they are older) or a Jewish person who is doing it as part of their culture.
I’m sorry to disagree with you on this, but it is something I feel quite strongly about. I got into an argument a year ago in my Religious Education class with some privileged white girls about FGM. They were using the excuse “but it’s just part of their culture”. No, I’m sorry, I don’t buy that argument. If anyone else strapped down a human being and tried to mutilate their genitals and tried to claim it as ‘culture’ or ‘tradition’, that wouldn’t fly with me either. My disapproval of MC has nothing to do with the fact that it is a Jewish tradition.
"Casual anti-Semitism is believing there’s no valid reason to circumcise a child." There IS no valid reason. But does that mean I am automatically labelled as hating and distrustful of Jews??
Edit: Here is another really good reply to the OP that I might as well include here.
One Direction to girls everywhere: your low self-esteem is hot
My sentiments exactly.
God, I hate that song. I didn’t know it was by that band I keep hearing talked about (I keep thinking One Direction is one of the groups from Glee or a religious band).
THIS FUCKING THIS! I have always had this feeling about that FUCKING song, but couldn’t quite put it into words. Great article: I just shared it on facebook (prepare for shitstorm??)
I’ve always thought that was such a strange line. You don’t know you’re beautiful, that’s what makes you beautiful?
I guess it’s appealing for an attractive person to not be arrogant about it, but it’s possible to be aware of your beauty without being an asshole about it. Novel concept? By George, I hope not.
people, people, people, stop over analyzing songs and just jam the fuck out when it comes on the radio.
“Pointing out that something in the media is racist or sexist is not “ruining everything for everyone,” it’s drawing attention to the inherent prejudice that is engrained within our society in an attempt to make ourselves, and others around us, more actively aware of it. I am not content to silently accept discrimination or oppression in any form, so you can kindly stop telling me to “calm down and just enjoy something for once,” and back the fuck off. “
I agree with vickayyyyy. The song is well-intentioned. You can analyse it all you want, but don’t put words in those boys’ mouths and insist they’re encouraging low self-esteem in girls. Chances are they didn’t even write the song. Their music may be mediocre, but I’d say their hearts are in the right places.
@doctorhowmany, the thing is, it doesn’t matter how well-intentioned something is: if it leaves problematic messages, people are going to question it. The quote I directed at vickayyyyy was to say, look, we see a problem and we’re going to question it and we don’t appreciate people coming in with the holier-than-thou, calm down attitude (because we see it a lot: just look at the reaction against Anita Sarkeesian’s suggestion of critiquing sexism in videogames). I personally am sick of being told to calm down and if I even begin to say “hey actually I don’t think that x element of y is ok”, I get a million y-lovers screaming at me to stop ruining y for them. I can still enjoy y, but I can also still be aware of problematic aspects.
For me personally, this song was just one of many songs that iterate this message: guys will like you if you don’t actually think you’re beautiful. So for ages I couldn’t accept compliments, and I thought it would make me more attractive if I was one of those girls who just didn’t know how beautiful she was. I genuinely thought guys would find it attractive if I downplayed my looks and rejected flatteries, because all these songs kept telling me that ~insecurity~ (of course they wouldn’t use that word though) was appealing. I completely understand that 1D themselves most likely did not write the song, and I’m not necessarily bashing them as a group of people (I really don’t know anything much about them at all to comment), but I can still critique what messages their song is conveying.
I’m calling for all followers of mine who have liked the page Atheist Alliance International on Facebook to unlike it. I am a staunch atheist and have liked basically every atheist page there is, but this page has crossed a fucking line. It posted that picture of Gabby Douglas, you know the one:
I made several comments voicing my distaste at this picture being posted, and countering some of the racist and bigoted comments by other people, and fortunately I was not the only person to do this. There were many of us outraged at AAI posting this picture. However, upon checking the page today, AAI have blocked me from making further comments or liking other peoples’ comments, AND deleted my comments, along with many other comments that respectfully expressed their dislike of the picture.
I am just so fucking sick of Atheist groups and pages being full of sexist, racist, intolerant, hateful, bigoted DOUCHEBAGS. If we’re trying to advocate for a more secular world, we’re doing a fucking great job of making ourselves look like assholes and pushing people further and further away from the movement.
I see atheists rant on and on about how oppressed Muslim women are, only to throw out a Kitchen Joke when a woman enters the conversation. They’ll complain at how theists can’t use logic or rationality, only to profess that they are anti-feminist and oppressed as white males.
Fuck you, Atheist Alliance International. You are bigoted and intolerant and can’t handle the slightest bit of criticism directed at your content. Get fucked.
^ My facebook status. HA HA HA WHAT’S THE BET THAT ANYONE WILL GIVE A FLYING FUCK. Seriously, make your bets. I post a picture of the apple pie I ate for dessert and I got 14 likes. But a petition asking the Turkish government to stop imposing a 4-week abortion ban? Sharing the page “Campaign for LGBT marriage and adoption in New Zealand”? A status about attending the SlutWalk?
when people segregate anime or manga from every other form of entertainment ever. they make it a genre. like, ya, anime is a genre of tv, just like manga is a genre of reading. kind of like like how laptops or books are genres of fiction -.-
anime is animation. the simpsons are animation, family guy is animation, and so is fucking adventure time and the regular show, all shows that people who hate on anime watch. you fratty, elitist, “popular kid” fuck off faggot gay boys aren’t any different than us nerds, geeks, freaks, and dorks.
it’s entertainment, fuck faces. entertainment. like, sure, there’s a lot of shitty anime, but there’s a lot of shitty live action stuff. but that’s the thing. they shouldn’t be distinguished. like, anime is a part of television. it’s not a genre of television. don’t ever let anyone fucking tell you that.
i’m thinking about this, because it was brought to my attention today that some big giant homo’s facebook status was something like “anime necklaces aren’t fashion, c’mon guys.” now, i doubt he’d be saying this if it were like… a band logo necklace, or a necklace from even some other show… i’m willing to say even if it was homer simpson on that person’s necklace, he wouldn’t have thought twice about the person’s apparel.
that’s the fucking problem. no one wears anime paraphernalia because they think it’s hip, they do it because it’s what they want to wear. they’re doing it for themselves, not you fuckos out there who can’t tell the difference between dexter and death note.
no one says this shit about people who wear band or other tv shirts. no one cares that people wear family guy or metallica shirts. they’re no different. it’s just stuff we like.
why is anime so special? why does no one care when people talk about their favorite music in public, but my friends get embarrassed when i try and tell them what happened this week in bleach if we’re not in private? i fucking hate that. pussies. this has to go away. this fucking stigma MUST die. why should people be afraid to openly like anime or manga? it’s just understood that it’s something you don’t do. you don’t talk about it at parties, or chicks will hear you and never wanna fuck you. like, i’ve heard so many people say that they wouldn’t talk about their current manga’s on facebook, because that’s what tumblr is for. why is there a difference? are you kidding? tumblr isn’t a closet community. that is NOT what this is for. they feel safe here because no one gives them shit, but they forget to realize that the tumblrites are just as real and probably way cooler than the shitty friends that they have to hide from.
no one ever fucking cares what books you read, or what tv you watch until it comes to anime or manga. nothing. things get bashed, like twilight or other stuff i’m sure, but no one is so terribly shamed for the things that turn them on then fans of anime or manga.
WHO FUCKING CARES what you like. i’m so sick of my friends saying they can’t catch up on an anime because they’re afraid of being caught. so. fucking. what. fuck. i’m getting so mad typing this.
i wish i could articulate this a lot better, but i can’t. i’m way too fucking pissed right now. eat shit, faggy frat fucking cool kid wanna be top 40 listening homo shit farming douche dick gay boys.
Ahaha I love you. I totally agree, but I’ve never personally experienced any real stigmatisation. Mostly it’s just explaining to other white girls what anime and manga are, and how to pronounce the words. I guess maybe people (I assume mostly girls) don’t want to labeled weeaboos? Or just be the try-hard white person? Or something? I’m not sure. But whatever the answer is, I agree that people need to stand up for what they like, and accept that you’ll probably always receive shit for SOMEthing you like (for me it’s my love of the singer P!nk: you have no idea the shit I get for that, and how much I hear her described as an angry butch dyke), so why shouldn’t that thing be manga?
I think it really boils down to ignorance. Most people only know one or two types of anime (like Pokemon or CardCaptors) and they seem to think those animes = all animes.
They don’t have a clue of the diversity of it. How it is just a form of animation, and not just one genre, and that it’s not always just girls with huge boobs and eyes. Do you think they know the difference between shōjo and shōnen? NO. So they don’t have the right to an opinion about what anime/manga is like.
As for the “you don’t talk about it at parties, or chicks will hear you and never wanna fuck you”, I am a chick that finds my boyfriend’s appreciation of manga a very fuckable quality. ;) Haters gonna hate.
I went for a run today! :D But excuse me while I have a wee rant.
While I was running, I could see a group of tweenagers a few metres ahead of me, walking in a line and completely blocking the footpath. As I ran, I logically assumed that they would part so I could get through. BUT NO. FUCKING NO. I got ALL the way up to them, and they still hadn’t moved. So I skidded to a halt right in front of them, and EVEN THEN they barely parted an inch. So I shoved my way between them and said, “Oh come on, guys,” in a pissed off tone, and kept running. I had my iPod in so I couldn’t hear their inevitable bitchy/shocked comments. But…. FFUUUUUUCCCCKCKKKKKKKKKKing HELL. What happened to this crazy little notion called…what was it? Oh yeah, COMMON. COURTESY.
As if running isn’t hard enough without some little shits making it even harder. Fuck.
I’ve been to every shoe shop in town and can’t find a pair of shoes that a) don’t rub, b) are aesthetically pleasing, c) wearable for a whole evening, d) silver or something that matches my Leaver’s Ball dress, e) high heels but not too high. IS THAT TOO MUCH TO ASK? *pants* ARGH.
I love high heels. I love how they add +100 sexiness points. But they’re so damn uncomfortable. After a few hours I’m always moaning, “ARGH MY BAALLLSSS (
of my feet)!” Our feet are not MADE to wear high heels. They’re so bad for you. But… society loves how they look. I guess in the way they liked the idea of small feet on women and bound girls’ feet in China. Or how our society has grown to love large breasts and lips so women feel a societal pressure to get plastic surgery.
I have blisters from trying on so many shoes.
I remember sitting in class having a group discussion about the character Joel in ‘Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind’, and how he is really quiet and doesn’t talk much. One girl in the group is that girl who no one has heard speak very much. Suddenly everyone starts talking about quiet people, and how creepy they are, and why don’t they just say something, and are the sitting there judging us, stuff like that. And I’m like, you rude fucks. There’s a quiet girl right there, and you’re badmouthing quiet people? Just coz you don’t shut up doesn’t mean we should all be like you, babbling on about nothing. This girl is actually really lovely if you make a goddam effort to get to know her, so how dare you complain that quiet/shy people sit there and judge you? If she does happen to think you’re all cunts, then you deserve it.
Also, this reminds me a lot of George. He was quiet at school, and people gave him shit because he’s like, tall, muscly and fit, so people expect him to be one of those jock guys. But because he wasn’t, the status quo felt fucked up, so people decided to be dicks to him.
Fuck bullies. Fuck judging. Fuck assumptions. Get to know someone before you start trying to destroy them.