JUMP SCARE DO NOT CLICK THE LINK!
Yes sure, the new YouTube comment (now called post, I believe) section sucks, but what’s worse about it is that on EVERY VIDEO I go on, this is the top comment. DO NOT CLICK THE LINK! The link will either take you to a virus or something like it. Apparently (I haven’t clicked it myself but several people have) once you click it, a jump scare pops out of you. THERE IS NO GOING BACK, GOOGLE DIDN’T ANNOUNCE IT. DO NOT CLICK THE LINK!!!
It’s fairly ridiculous that spam and viruses are the “top comments” on YouTube right now. Google, get your act together.
Spreading the message! Google and YouTube, figure your freaking comment system out. ‘Cause right now, it sucks.
Indeed, does it suck!
Man isn’t it so ironically hilarious that Google tried to make people think the change was to prevent spam posts but it’s led to even worse spamming than before in like three days?
ugh so heads up to anyone who goes to see This Is The End: it’s pretty much a two-hour rape and violence-against-women joke. Explanation under the cut, massive TW for rape and violence.
This past Thursday, a group of men started cat-calling/hitting on a group of women in Chicago. When the women said, no, the men threw bottles and then SHOT at their car as they tried to drive away. One woman was shot in the shoulder, and the driver took a bottle in the head as she tried to drive off. Last month in Washington, DC a Transwoman was shot for turning down a man’s request for sex as she sat in her car. In August a woman in Atlanta was shot for refusing to get in a car with a group of men. In May of 2010 a young woman was shot in the leg for turning down a man’s advances.
Ok, so that was one googling, which also yielded an article on a woman in Australia who was shot in the thigh after refusing to perform oral sex. Many people will claim that these are just “isolated” incidents. But three of those took place in the last two, two and a half months. That’s not really isolated, in fact, that sounds distinctly like a pattern.
When guys complain about women not giving them a straight answer, this is why. Granted, these are fairly extreme. However, on a regular basis women who turn down men, no matter how nicely, are insulted, yelled at, spit on, hit, kicked and knocked to the ground. Most of these assaults go unreported because women know that the police aren’t going to take them seriously, particularly if they’re dressed at all nicely or “sexy.”
This is why the Schrodinger’s Rapist post resonated with so many women.
“Why are you afraid of women?” I asked a group of men.
“We’re afraid they’ll laugh at us,” replied the men.
“Why are you afraid of men?” I asked a group of women
“We’re afraid they’ll kill us,” replied the woman. -Margaret Atwood
When men ignore our boundaries, try to push or test them, we rightfully feel that they are a bigger risk for pushing even more important, dangerous boundaries, like say, raping or hitting you.
Yeah, I know, a lot of you are out there (if you’ve gotten this far) thinking, “That’s bullshit! I’d never do that!” And maybe you wouldn’t, but we can’t take that chance. And when you push boundaries or ignore our “No”s, even about small things, this puts you higher and higher up on the risk scale.
We can’t take those chances because when we’re raped or assaulted it’s always our fault. Everyone tells us so. Every single person who says, “I’d never blame the victim, but if you’re wearing a short skirt, what do you expect?” Every fucking magazine with their “Ten Things You Can Do to Not Be Raped” articles, that place all the onus on women, and none of it on, oh, the rapists.
How do you not scare women?
Respect their boundaries. Take no at face value. As a commenter said over on Pharyngula, you have nothing to lose: If she meant no, you’ve respected her wishes. If she meant “pursue me harder” or whatever bullshit, then bullet dodged. You don’t want to deal with that kind of mind-game playing, anyway.
But in all seriousness, guys, if you ever wonder why women act like their scared of you, read the above links again.
Schrodinger’s Rapist is an excellent article. If you haven’t read it, then I encourage you to read it. Trigger warning: mentions of sexual assault or rape.
If a cis man is griping about there not being enough cis-men-only spaces (gyms, clubs, whatever), ask him why he feels there needs to be. Without telling him why we need women-only spaces. See what he comes up with without help.
Then, when he likely comes up with squat, ask if he feels like his gender is underrepresented in government, the media, and what people deem the most “important” or “intelligent” careers and hobbies.
Ask if he can’t name prominent male figures in supposedly female-dominated careers like fashion.
Ask if he feels threatened when going into spaces occupied by women.
Ask if he’s ever been verbally abused during online gaming for no other reason that he’s a man and men shouldn’t or can’t play video games.
Ask if he worries daily about being harassed when doing day-to-day activities in spaces occupied by women.
Ask if he’s been harassed on the street at least weekly since he was in his early teens for no other reason than his gender.
Ask if he was ever attacked or bullied by a girl or group of girls when he was younger, only to be told “girls will be girls” when he tried to seek justice.
Ask if the majority of his male friends have been sexually assaulted* and then blamed for it, because of what they were wearing, who they were with, where they were, or how friendly they were or weren’t to the woman who assaulted them.
Ask if he’s ever been threatened and verbally abused because he didn’t feel like sleeping with, flirting with, or even acknowledging a woman.
Ask if society acts as though it is a woman’s natural state to harm him and that it’s his responsibility to protect himself from women.
When he answers no, then ask again: why does he feel that there needs to be more male-only spaces?
(*NOTE: Male-only spaces for male victims of domestic abuse and/or sexual assault are one thing, but this post is in response to an ask about some dude bitching about not having men-only gyms just because women-only gyms exist and WHAT ABOUT THE MEN???)